It's not over...

Saturday night Caden was off to a fun-filled night at the hockey game with his little friend, Hunter. What a perfect opportunity to spoil Alayna with a little time just for her. Of course, her first request was Dairy Queen! But, she couldn't decide between her dilly bar or daddy's cone!

Unfortunately within just an hour, she exploded into hives. Poor little girl was screaming from a sore belly, suffering from a brisk cough, and scrapping her skin off with her finger nails.

Hopefully there is still time to grow out of this peanut allergy.

Cherish the Days

Each semester, I sit on a panel in a Women and Aging course at St. Ambrose for psychology and women's studies students, to share stories about pregnancy, childbirth and labor experiences. It's always such neat recollection of the magical moments that brought Caden and Alayna into this world.

This panel reminds me that everything I once hated... maternity clothes, Taco Bell cravings, varicose veins, and the slight nausea, turns into such minimal issues after you watch your child take their first breath, mimic their first word, attempt their first step, or run off to their first day of school. It also reminds me though, of the fantastically funny moments that I shared with my husband... peeing my pants in Target, my water breaking in bed, asking why I needed to call a crotch doctor for my eye problem when I got tunnel vision, the manual breast pump experiences, and the poop-shooting of our first born.

In the end, my goal of participating in the panel was to instill in these students (and any others interested in childbearing) that no matter how awful the experience sounds, there is nothing more beautiful than pregnancy and child-birth; it's truly one of the most amazing and miraculous events in human nature. One of my co-panelists left the group of students with a statement that I thought was very thought provoking:

"Just when you think the days are so long, the years are so short." 

• Ten years ago, I was studying hard, partying often, and spending free-spirited time with my crush.
• Nine years ago, I was graduating from college and trying to plan a successful future.
• Eight years ago, I took a leap of faith and moved to Minneapolis with my boyfriend.
• Seven years ago, I married the most supportive friend in my world, and the only one who can truly give me a reality check.
• Six years ago, I was blessed with the conception of my first child.
• Five years ago, I was praying to God that our six-week-premature son would be okay.
• Four years ago, I gave up the idea of living in the big city, and decided I'd rather be closer to family.
• Three years ago, a princess entered my life, and I have loved watching myself within her.
• Two years ago, I watched a really special interaction develop between my two babies.
• One year ago, my oldest started preschool and fell in love with learning.
• One month ago, I reprimanded my daughter for talking back.
• Last week, I screamed at my children for screaming at each other.
• This week, I had a very intimate and loving conversation with my husband which brought us full circle.
• Yesterday, I laughed with my son for giggling about boogers.
• Today, I'm thankful for my moments with those I love.
• Tomorrow, I'll be looking back and hoping I did it all the right way.

And that's what family is about...

I grew up in a very close-knit family. As kids, we shared everything between us... food, clothes, space. Now as adults, we are intimate with new things like traditions, dreams, secrets, and advice. Our extended families never have received the same amount of attention. While we've always cherished the moments spent with cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents, we grew up in families that were too big for "just-because" get-togethers. My mother had five siblings and my dad had seven; our gatherings were reserved for the holidays.

Unfortunately, that created some issues as a child. I never felt a special bond or connection to one cousin or another. I never favored one aunt or grandma over another. We were all just family, in my eyes. And then I married and moved to Minneapolis. I became the only one to not live within 30 miles of Cedar Rapids. We sure tried to come back as much as possible to visit, but our connections with our extended family solely relied on holiday traditions.

Then maturity set in a bit more, and I hit my aha! moment. Jarin and I began having children and we grasped the true value in being closer to our whole family. It was a battle, as one friend recently explained to me, between living up the life you have to live, or realizing that being close to your family is what it's all about. So we relocated again.

In recent years other changes have taken place. I've lost two of my last three living grandparents, and holiday traditions have become focused on the attempts to continue their traditions. I must say, that the Skala side has done a facinating job, thanks to the effort of my amazing aunts. Some day I hope to express my true appreciation to them for building this definition of family.

Without Grandma Pat around though, mom's side has created plenty of excuses for eliminating a Christmas celebration in the past two years. But, we put an end to that this year and had, for the first time, a "just-because" get-together with loads of food, family and fun. It was an amazing time, and proved to us all that 1.) holidays aren't the only reason to connect and that 2.) we really do need each other. After all, we are one big family. Enjoy the pictures!

Sweet Henley (cold and all) kept us all entertained!

AJ and Cade were pals for the day!

Everyone hanging out and enjoying the company.

Alayna was the big girl for the day!

The "kids" before saying good-bye.

The Purpose of Today

We're pretty practical people. We rarely rush toward the new fads. We purchase things as we need them. And, yes, I said need. Okay, so possibly there is a confusion between needs and wants amongst our family! That's probably what stirs the conversation of celebrating a holiday, like Valentine's Day. This weekend, Jarin and I spent some good time discussing whether or not we should "do anything" for V-Day. 

In the past we haven't. We don't give fancy gifts. Not for Valentine's Day or our anniversary. I actually remember when we started dating and requesting that I don't ever receive flowers as an apology, or on Valentine's Day. I didn't want roses because they are marked up to $100 per dozen or because his concious is telling him it's the right thing to do.

But then, as my point went on Saturday, what's wrong with having a reason to celebrate your love on a specific day? Sometimes our lives get so busy running kids to and from basketball, preschool, and daycare, picking up groceries, visiting family, putting in the hours at work, still trying to exercise, keeping up on laundry, scrubbing dishes, and wanting to catch the most recent American Idol clip... that we allow the importance of sending a card, writing a few special words in a love note, eating dinner just the two of you, or lighting a candle, slip to the wayside.

Isn't it quite possible that an anniversary or Valentine's day could be a practical way to force us out of the chaotic lifestyle and into a grateful moment to cherish your partner... even just for one day? I'm not asking for diamonds as a thank-you-for-being-you-gift on Feb 14th. But I do think that we should stop viewing it as an over-rated, commercialized holiday, and more of an opportunity to let those you love know how special they are.

So do your part today. Make sure that before you go to bed tonight, the most special people in your life know how much they mean to you. Can you do it without candy, flowers, or jewlery? I know you can. Prioritze, for just one day, and I guarantee you'll feel better about the idea of Valentine's Day.

Have fun with love today!

Dinner with a Princess

Food is a hot commodity around our house. Cade is already eating like a senior lineman, putting down a standard three packets of oatmeal each morning, and usually second helpings at dinner. Alayna on the other hand, works in slow motion.

Seriously, Jarin and I have battled her dinner hour (which often times exceeds an hour!!) She always finishes, but the process is a whirlwind. She's everywhere... up-down, in-out, big chair-little chair, spoon-fork, napkin-papertowel, cup-straw....It's exhausting!!

After about 15 minutes of this mad-house craziness last night, I thought I'd video record her to share a little of the humor! Here are a few snippets.... Rest assured, her knowledge of being recorded had no influence on her behavior. This is truly a snapshot of our nightly routine!

 

That was enough, she was bored! Here's her dancing all around kitchen with a bit of attitude...

 

I've had enough... I finally pull out the bribes! 

Holy Toledo!! She's finally done!

 

Gotta love those expressions, the wiggles, and the giggles. She sure makes our evenings entertaining!

A Double Dose of Birthday Wishes

We have two very special people in our lives who are celebrating a birthday today...

First, Happy Birthday to Uncle Blake! You've really made an impact on our little Caden ... he idolizes every move you make and will probably be driving a Harley before a car, thanks to you!

And then to Aunt Jacque... you always keep our time together exciting and fun! Thanks for making sure the kids and you have special smiles together! Can you believe you are 40!?!?! Oh, wait, was that a secret? ;-)

 

I guess, most importantly, thanks to Uncle Justin and Aunt Meggie for bringing these very special people into our lives! We love you!!

The Snow Prayer

As anticipated, the blizzard if 2011 came through the midwest and knocked through many neighborhoods and cities, piling on well over a foot and a half of snow here in Davenport. The drifts in our neighborhood were close to five foot in some places.

Backyard view as the snow started falling

As much as I'm not a fan of the winter season, there was something fun about the anticipation of the snowfall. I talked up a "snow day" to the kids and we even stocked up on Cheetos, powdered sugar donuts, and movies, just to ensure that we were ready if we had to stay home! Thank goodness everyone's school cancelled, or I may have had a few unhappy children.

And we did spend the day as promised... enjoying all the fun things I remember doing as a kid... sleeping in, playing board games, watching movies, and eating rotten junkfood!

We played outside in the snow (even if it was too cold)! However, we didn't last too long before Alayna told me her "cheeks are fweezing." Even daddy got to stay home, but between snowblowing and working, he didn't get to have as much fun as us!

2 hour process of snowblowing!!

drift behind our house that Cade tried climbing

the sidewalk felt like a fort to the kids!

Putting the kids to bed that night Caden wanted to say his own prayers.... "Dear Grandma Pat, please tell Father God to make this snow go away. Amen." By the photo below, you can see why he shared those prayers! 

one of the largest thoroughfares in Davenport...
4 lanes are down to only 2.5 because of the snow removal

Life Lesson #438: don't skimp on haircuts

So I took a risk today... A big risk! I decided to forego my regular salon, save a couple bucks, and get in quick for a haircut. What can be so tough about cutting my hair when it's midway down my back, right? Shoot, it's even curly, so if it's not straight when I leave, so be it... So I walked into Capri College, a cosmetology school here....

Holy crap! I completely walked into a downward spiral!

First, my appointment was at 3:30, and no one said a word to me for the first 15 minutes. I actually had my keys in my hand, ready to walk out, when they called my name. The girl looked like a troll! Her hair was all kinds of uneven, her face was all scrunched up, her glasses barely hung onto the edge of her nose, and she walked like oompa-loompa.

Can you imagine the thoughts running through my head?

So she asks me what I wanted done, and it was all I could do not to just apologize and walk out. But, I refrained, and explained a trim would be appreciated. She hands me a contract basically stating that if she screws up my hair, she's not responsible. The chick then gets her teacher who comes and asks if its ok to cut my hair dry because they didnt have much time. Seriously? One can't even get a comb through my dry, nappy hair, let alone be able to cut it dry with any accuracy!

She must have read my non-verbals at this point... Hell, I could have still been looking at the student cross-eyed, wondering if I was really going to put myself through this. During the shampoo she poked me in the eye, pulled my earring out, drapped her broken apron across my face (twice), and leaned her nasty, troll-smelling, armpit BO across my body. For a while she couldn't find the shampoo/conditioner she wanted, so I was stuck without neck support longer than necessary.

The teacher started the cut (to save time) and concluded that I must swim 3 times a week because of the build-up in my hair. Thanks crazy-lady, but I haven't been in a pool since last August! It's just called coarse hair and I deal with it everyday.

After the student made a couple snips off the back, she actually looked at the instructor and said, "what should I do with the sides?" She finally finished, and started taking my cape off, but my hair was still fricking drenched! Mind you, its the coldest day of the year and windchills are about -15 today, but whatever... I paid for my $10 haircut and ran out.

Going forward, I am happy to pay $40 for an hour of relaxation, normal conversation, and worry-free style. Oh. My. God.

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Happy 2nd Birthday Vivienne Lee!

Two years ago, we were blessed with a precious niece who has brought so much fun to our lives. She made us an Uncle and Aunt for the first time, and it was a sure honor! Vivienne has since been named our Goddaughter and I think I speak for Jarin and I when I say that we are most happy to lead you through the life of God, Vivi. There will not be any force in this world that will keep us from helping you achieve your dreams. It's amazing that you are already two years old. Keep smiling girly! We love you!

Making time for bathtime...

Our kids have always been big on bathtime, and it is one of those things that we never spend enough time enjoying. As parents, we spend the day rushing through life just to get home in time to put together dinner quick, clean up, maybe find a couple minutes for an activity, and then we're off for a speedy bath, a book, and goodnight kisses.

Well, tonight was different. Instead we started bathtime shortly after 6pm, and I sat back while they used their imaginations together. Conversations included everything from Chucky Cheese to Rudolph. They played make-believe with computers at work, hair supplies from the salon, flu shots from the doctor, and babies from daycare, until their fingers were wrinkled!

It was fun to watch them enjoy the simple pleasures of having each other as siblings, not needing the fancy Leapsters or addicting TV to stay entertained, but soaking up the child mind. Their laughs, smiles, tackles, giggles, and swimming adventures are easy entertainment.... Even for mom!

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