Remember the jokes that started with: "how many blondes does it take to...." Well, I feel as though I'm cracking a new line of riddles here in Shanghai. They should start with: "In China, how many American's does it take to...." and then fill in the blank with...
- purchase a phone
- get to the market
- turn the channel on the TV
- find bedding
- replace a light bulb
and on, and on, and on...
Many people told me we should go on the show House Hunters International, but I think a better one for me is Candid Camera. I feel like an idiot here!!!
Wednesday I attended a new parent coffee meeting at the kids' school. Talk about informative!
Who knew that you should not buy meat at the market we've been visiting? Or that all vegetables and fruits needed to be scrubbed with a pesticide spray, not just run under filtered water? Or that at the market there are Chinese prices and Western prices -- I'll let you guess which is more. Or that spending 3 hours or more grocery shopping is totally the norm?
Who knew that you employ a driver, not only for a personal taxi, but to pay your bills, fix your shoes, repair the Wii that we blew up when we first plugged it in, take care of dry cleaning, or have furniture made by his local friends for way cheap? Or that your Ayi is the one who can wait at the house all day for a grocery (or phone) delivery, while you enjoy the city?
I need to come to grips with this culture!!
In the meantime, we've called the engineer to replace lightbulbs. [Shut up. I know it sounds ridiculous!] I've ordered a phone on Amazon for Cash on Delivery, and waited for like 5 complete days for it to arrive because my address wasn't entered in Chinese. I've wandered pharmacies for a whole morning looking for medicine for my sick children, when my Ayi completed the task in the blink of an eye and then handed me the receipt for reimbursement.
Well, I got this now!
From here out, I'm attending classes, going on tours, and meeting up with friends... because let me tell you, when diapers and dinner can be delivered to your door on the same day, for free, why wouldn't I?
Thursday, August 28, 2014
Tuesday, August 26, 2014
Our First Day of School
Now that I have VPN, I've been scrolling through social media and seeing everyone's adorable chalkboard signs on the first day of school. Beautiful, colorful bubble letters explaining the grade, the child's admirations, and of course what they want to be when they grow up.
Us, here in Shanghai... we don't quite roll like that. (Not to discount the big shout out deserved by all the kick ass mom's who have their stuff together.)
Wednesday marked our first day of school for the kiddos. Oh, the many "first" experiences that we have coming! Beginning at an international school, meeting their teachers from England and South Africa -- how fascinating is that!?!?, wearing uniforms, and boarding a small charter bus to transport them. The kids were overwhelmed with excitement!
They tucked in early Tuesday evening, and I wished I would have gone to bed with them. I dilly-dallied around on this computer (because HELLO!! that's when all my American friends are active!) and finally settled in around 11:30. Jarin was still traveling, and then the remainder of my night went as such:
1 a.m. Paisley awakes. I try to get her back down, but good luck.
1:34 a.m. I'm putting her to bed, and don't care how long she "cries-it-out."
1:37 a.m. I can't handle it anymore. I go get her and bring her to my bed.
1:55 a.m. She is so restless, and has been crawling all over my head. BTW, Alayna had asked to sleep with me since Jarin was out of town, so now I'm afraid she is going to be waken too.
2:10 a.m. P drinks a full glass of water, lets out two huge, manly farts, and says "yeah" when I ask if she's ready for bed.
2:22 a.m. She is still crying
2:24 a.m. I get back up and we take in the view from the living room... and also spy a little into all the other windows with lights on.
2:30 a.m. I take her back to my room. Bad idea. She now has Alayna up, giving her kisses.
2:47 a.m. We go to Paisley's room, I rock her and rub her back until she breaks down and falls asleep.
3:03 a.m. Finally. My turn to sleep.
3:34 a.m. Alayna awakes to tell me her tummy hurts. I sit in the bathroom with her while she explodes.
Oh my God, I can't handle the smell.
3:45 a.m. She is ready to go back to bed, but not sure if she might puke. I go get a bowl to keep next to her in bed. Oh yeah, we don't have any bowls. So I bring the largest soup kettle I can find and place it on her pillow.
4:34 a.m. I wake to hear her vomitting beside me.
Okay. Now this is the worst smell ever.
5:07 a.m. The rally is finally over and I clean everything up and try to go back to bed, knowing that my alarm is set for less than 40 min from now.
6:20 a.m. I finally roll out of bed and get Cade up for school. I inform him that Alayna has been sick and won't be going to school. He breaks down because he doesn't want to ride the bus alone.
6:32 a.m. We check on Alayna. She is fine and cheery! She puts on her uniform, takes a swig from her water bottle and pukes everywhere.
Great.
Of course, P is still sleeping because she partied last night. Aly is puking, Cade still needs breakfast and walked down to the bus stop in less than 20 min. But he's upset. This is when super-mom-powers kick in and before long, I have this handsome boy all ready to board his bus... in the rain!
Sidenote: I'm sitting here typing this blog entry and I just heard an awful-vomit-like sound. I jumped from the office to uncover which child is spewing all over this time. After seeing three peaceful babies asleep in their beds, I realize that the bacon was ready to be collected on Cade's Hay Day game.
Seriously, this is my life.
So, we begin with Day 2, which is really Day 1 for Alayna.
Jarin is home now, but we are all exhausted from travel and being up all night. We sleep through the alarm, and wake 6 minutes before the bus is departing. Frantically, Jarin gets the kids dressed, I call the bus monitor, we meet at the second stop, and the kids get yelled at for being late. They now think that "Chinese people get mad easily."
I truly can't imagine trying to get a photo with the kids posed next to their personalized chalkboard sign. Shoot. I just want a photo of them going to school together!
And so, we pretend... even though it's the start of day 5... how cute are these 1st and 3rd graders?
Us, here in Shanghai... we don't quite roll like that. (Not to discount the big shout out deserved by all the kick ass mom's who have their stuff together.)
Wednesday marked our first day of school for the kiddos. Oh, the many "first" experiences that we have coming! Beginning at an international school, meeting their teachers from England and South Africa -- how fascinating is that!?!?, wearing uniforms, and boarding a small charter bus to transport them. The kids were overwhelmed with excitement!
1 a.m. Paisley awakes. I try to get her back down, but good luck.
1:34 a.m. I'm putting her to bed, and don't care how long she "cries-it-out."
1:37 a.m. I can't handle it anymore. I go get her and bring her to my bed.
1:55 a.m. She is so restless, and has been crawling all over my head. BTW, Alayna had asked to sleep with me since Jarin was out of town, so now I'm afraid she is going to be waken too.
2:10 a.m. P drinks a full glass of water, lets out two huge, manly farts, and says "yeah" when I ask if she's ready for bed.
2:22 a.m. She is still crying
2:24 a.m. I get back up and we take in the view from the living room... and also spy a little into all the other windows with lights on.
2:30 a.m. I take her back to my room. Bad idea. She now has Alayna up, giving her kisses.
2:47 a.m. We go to Paisley's room, I rock her and rub her back until she breaks down and falls asleep.
3:03 a.m. Finally. My turn to sleep.
3:34 a.m. Alayna awakes to tell me her tummy hurts. I sit in the bathroom with her while she explodes.
Oh my God, I can't handle the smell.
3:45 a.m. She is ready to go back to bed, but not sure if she might puke. I go get a bowl to keep next to her in bed. Oh yeah, we don't have any bowls. So I bring the largest soup kettle I can find and place it on her pillow.
4:34 a.m. I wake to hear her vomitting beside me.
Okay. Now this is the worst smell ever.
5:07 a.m. The rally is finally over and I clean everything up and try to go back to bed, knowing that my alarm is set for less than 40 min from now.
6:20 a.m. I finally roll out of bed and get Cade up for school. I inform him that Alayna has been sick and won't be going to school. He breaks down because he doesn't want to ride the bus alone.
6:32 a.m. We check on Alayna. She is fine and cheery! She puts on her uniform, takes a swig from her water bottle and pukes everywhere.
Great.
Of course, P is still sleeping because she partied last night. Aly is puking, Cade still needs breakfast and walked down to the bus stop in less than 20 min. But he's upset. This is when super-mom-powers kick in and before long, I have this handsome boy all ready to board his bus... in the rain!
Sidenote: I'm sitting here typing this blog entry and I just heard an awful-vomit-like sound. I jumped from the office to uncover which child is spewing all over this time. After seeing three peaceful babies asleep in their beds, I realize that the bacon was ready to be collected on Cade's Hay Day game.
Seriously, this is my life.
So, we begin with Day 2, which is really Day 1 for Alayna.
Jarin is home now, but we are all exhausted from travel and being up all night. We sleep through the alarm, and wake 6 minutes before the bus is departing. Frantically, Jarin gets the kids dressed, I call the bus monitor, we meet at the second stop, and the kids get yelled at for being late. They now think that "Chinese people get mad easily."
I truly can't imagine trying to get a photo with the kids posed next to their personalized chalkboard sign. Shoot. I just want a photo of them going to school together!
And so, we pretend... even though it's the start of day 5... how cute are these 1st and 3rd graders?
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
The Good, Bad and Ugly
In Shanghai, it might be better said as: the fascinating, the frightening, and the frustrating. Seriously, after two weeks here, I'm not sure there is another city in this world as complex with culture and systems quite like this one. We've seen every walk of life, every kind of food, a variety of transportation, a lack of rules and standards, some of the most amazing architechture, and the biggest slums. We've been taken back by beauty and by rudeness, and for the first time in my life, I've shoved people aside who stared at my children. I've had long talks with people I've never met before, shared stories, frustrations, and (believe-it-or-not) things I knew that someone else didn't. I feel like I've been here forever, while also feeling like I just stepped foot off the airplane.
Backing up....
The trip here was utterly miserable. We boarded the plane to find no outlets, USB or personal TV's. With 14 hours ahead of us, I thought for sure we were doomed because my plans for the older two had just backfired. But, to my surprise, it was the baby who didn't sleep, nor sit in her own chair, for the entire flight around the world. Even when waking her at 3 a.m. for take off, she still stayed up, kicking the chair in front of her, running the aisles, rolling on the back galley floor (trust me, I just puked in my mouth too), and annoying the hundred's of others on the plane who wanted shut-eye. So I held her, because of course at 16 months, she clearly let's us know that no one else can set finger on her -- even daddy. Cade and Layna, however, thought the flight to be amazing. They watched out the window for quite some time, and continued guessing what part of the world we were hovering at any given time.
Upon arriving here on August 4th, the apartment that Jarin had picked out was unveiled. In my crabby, cranky self, I told him I was disappointed. It wasn't clean, stunk like mold, had broken appliances and lights everywhere, and obviously held zilch of our personal belongings. We unpacked the 8 suitcases...which, did I mentioned cost us $1100 EXTRA? With no hangers, bedding, pillows, phone, dishes or food I felt a little lost. I didn't even know where to go to get this stuff! Nor, how to talk to the taxi driver to get me there!
I was stuck. In an apartment that I hated.
The next two days were still tricky. The hubs helped with getting a phone lined up, he provided me access to VPN so that I could Facebook and blog (thank God!), and then he was off on business for two days. It was funny listening to the kids who said, "how are we going to get anywhere because only daddy knows where to go." Yeah, yeah -- shut it. I can do this too, I thought. Well, that turned into a few consecutive days at the pool, because we figured out the clubhouse pretty quick :)
After that though, first thing was first. My fabulous BOB jogger was not going to cut it on these narrow sidewalks lined with 23 million people. No way. No how. Against the liking of my bean-counting husband, that meant a new, compact, light-weight $200 stroller. And, of course, that trip led to a few other purchases at this mega-amazing 6-story Super Brand Mall which just happens to be a couple miles from my home.
I also attempted IKEA in week #1, which was probably the most frightening experience of my life. I was in dire need of a bed for the baby, who had been co-sleeping with us for way too long in my book, and as I exited with a cart full of necessities (wine glasses, pillows, and bath towels) it was pouring. And just like the next 14 times it rained here, I didn't have an umbrella. I took my first cab that I found, which could have easily had rats running the floor boards. Black curtains covered the back windows, and at every stop the cabby pulled the emergency break and turned off the car. I seriously thought I was going to die. He scammed me for all I had, and drove so far around the city to take me home that I paid more than double my trip there. All the while I was texting Jarin with updates, and watching my phone battery quickly dwindle to 6%. I had never been so happy to see this apartment complex.
Exactly one week after our arrival here, we had visitors! And WOW! what a blessing. We toured on buses and cruises, went up in the Pearl Tower, ate at some amazing restaurants (and tried McDonalds), bardered with the best at the fake markets, and ultimately experienced Shanghai in 5 days. These dear Minnesota friends of ours also allowed for me to spend 2 hours purchasing one set of sheets, because God-forbid I be able to speak a lick of Mandrin. Before saying farewell, us lovebirds snuck out for a quick date night at a fab Thai restaurant right next to the Louis Vuitton. Of course, I had to stop in to check out the purse I dreamed about .... only 35000 RMB! No worries, our high-class cabbie dropped us off right in front of the Bentley.
In the last week, we also interviewed and hired our ayi, Xiao Fang, who started helping at the house on Monday. She is amazing and so in love with the kids. She speaks very good English, and is even teaching us some Mandrin. She has allowed me to fall in love with this apartment afterall. It's crazy how nice it is when it's clean! I also lost my brand new iPhone, which has been hell on wheels to track among the streets of Shanghai. I've given up on that idea now, and am just buying a new one, which she is helping me to do.
It's been two days since our visitors left, and the kids have had school orientation and are ready for their first day tomorrow. Jarin is now in Hong Kong to finally pick up our residence visa. It's all coming together so well, and I couldn't be happier. Yes, things are challenging, but we have to laugh at how ass-backwards it is here. I know that it's worth it though when I compare these feelings with the utter stress and annoyance I felt living apart. And then I see the kids' faces. They are lighting up here. They love their teachers, are eager to sign up for co-curriculars, have begun introducing themselves by their first name and homeland, and are begging for the ayi to babysit them. I know this isn't the life many would chose, but for us, it's going to be a good one.
Backing up....
The trip here was utterly miserable. We boarded the plane to find no outlets, USB or personal TV's. With 14 hours ahead of us, I thought for sure we were doomed because my plans for the older two had just backfired. But, to my surprise, it was the baby who didn't sleep, nor sit in her own chair, for the entire flight around the world. Even when waking her at 3 a.m. for take off, she still stayed up, kicking the chair in front of her, running the aisles, rolling on the back galley floor (trust me, I just puked in my mouth too), and annoying the hundred's of others on the plane who wanted shut-eye. So I held her, because of course at 16 months, she clearly let's us know that no one else can set finger on her -- even daddy. Cade and Layna, however, thought the flight to be amazing. They watched out the window for quite some time, and continued guessing what part of the world we were hovering at any given time.
Upon arriving here on August 4th, the apartment that Jarin had picked out was unveiled. In my crabby, cranky self, I told him I was disappointed. It wasn't clean, stunk like mold, had broken appliances and lights everywhere, and obviously held zilch of our personal belongings. We unpacked the 8 suitcases...which, did I mentioned cost us $1100 EXTRA? With no hangers, bedding, pillows, phone, dishes or food I felt a little lost. I didn't even know where to go to get this stuff! Nor, how to talk to the taxi driver to get me there!
I was stuck. In an apartment that I hated.
The next two days were still tricky. The hubs helped with getting a phone lined up, he provided me access to VPN so that I could Facebook and blog (thank God!), and then he was off on business for two days. It was funny listening to the kids who said, "how are we going to get anywhere because only daddy knows where to go." Yeah, yeah -- shut it. I can do this too, I thought. Well, that turned into a few consecutive days at the pool, because we figured out the clubhouse pretty quick :)
After that though, first thing was first. My fabulous BOB jogger was not going to cut it on these narrow sidewalks lined with 23 million people. No way. No how. Against the liking of my bean-counting husband, that meant a new, compact, light-weight $200 stroller. And, of course, that trip led to a few other purchases at this mega-amazing 6-story Super Brand Mall which just happens to be a couple miles from my home.
I also attempted IKEA in week #1, which was probably the most frightening experience of my life. I was in dire need of a bed for the baby, who had been co-sleeping with us for way too long in my book, and as I exited with a cart full of necessities (wine glasses, pillows, and bath towels) it was pouring. And just like the next 14 times it rained here, I didn't have an umbrella. I took my first cab that I found, which could have easily had rats running the floor boards. Black curtains covered the back windows, and at every stop the cabby pulled the emergency break and turned off the car. I seriously thought I was going to die. He scammed me for all I had, and drove so far around the city to take me home that I paid more than double my trip there. All the while I was texting Jarin with updates, and watching my phone battery quickly dwindle to 6%. I had never been so happy to see this apartment complex.
Exactly one week after our arrival here, we had visitors! And WOW! what a blessing. We toured on buses and cruises, went up in the Pearl Tower, ate at some amazing restaurants (and tried McDonalds), bardered with the best at the fake markets, and ultimately experienced Shanghai in 5 days. These dear Minnesota friends of ours also allowed for me to spend 2 hours purchasing one set of sheets, because God-forbid I be able to speak a lick of Mandrin. Before saying farewell, us lovebirds snuck out for a quick date night at a fab Thai restaurant right next to the Louis Vuitton. Of course, I had to stop in to check out the purse I dreamed about .... only 35000 RMB! No worries, our high-class cabbie dropped us off right in front of the Bentley.
In the last week, we also interviewed and hired our ayi, Xiao Fang, who started helping at the house on Monday. She is amazing and so in love with the kids. She speaks very good English, and is even teaching us some Mandrin. She has allowed me to fall in love with this apartment afterall. It's crazy how nice it is when it's clean! I also lost my brand new iPhone, which has been hell on wheels to track among the streets of Shanghai. I've given up on that idea now, and am just buying a new one, which she is helping me to do.
It's been two days since our visitors left, and the kids have had school orientation and are ready for their first day tomorrow. Jarin is now in Hong Kong to finally pick up our residence visa. It's all coming together so well, and I couldn't be happier. Yes, things are challenging, but we have to laugh at how ass-backwards it is here. I know that it's worth it though when I compare these feelings with the utter stress and annoyance I felt living apart. And then I see the kids' faces. They are lighting up here. They love their teachers, are eager to sign up for co-curriculars, have begun introducing themselves by their first name and homeland, and are begging for the ayi to babysit them. I know this isn't the life many would chose, but for us, it's going to be a good one.
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