Year 2 of Home in China

We've begun our second year as expats now, and what an amazing shift from just 12 months ago. I remember getting here in August 2014, and Jarin leaving just days later for a business trip. I was stuck, dumb-founded, wondering what I am supposed to do with three kids... in China... alone. This year, the same conference approached just days after returning from the summer holiday, and yet again, I was here... with three kids... in China.... alone.

But life is good here. We went to the market and were excited for some of the treats we'd missed over the summer. We connected with friends (who, to us, are family) that we hadn't seen in three months. We explored the community and neighborhood, and hung out at our clubhouse which offers a great outdoor swimming facility. I realized quickly how comfortable we really feel here. It's home.

Our First Summer

Another season has come and gone, and what a summer it was. In June we finished all the school projects and class parties, and wrapped up grades 1 and 3. We raced out the door, earlier than expected, to first celebrate the life of our beloved Grandma Gladys.

Then it was the beginning of a 6 week vacation, and excited we were! We were blessed with the amazing hospitality of my parents, drank wine nightly, stayed up late catching up and sharing laughs, and spent the days busily running the town -- trampoline parks, outdoor concerts, pontoon rides, American Girl, bike rides and races, swimming pools, shopping at Target and playdates. Each day was an adventure. We visited with so many friends and family members, yet missed time with few. We built relationships with grandparents and cousins, and created memories that we'd have forever.

Gettin' My Hair Did!

So, it's been 9 months since we moved into Shanghai, and I've done pretty well at timing my need for new-do's, but let's be honest, 5 or 6 months in between cuts and colors leaves me with less-than-adventurous color choices, and some grown-out layers that need attention... bad. My girl, Brooke, has done me well though, helping me work it out until I returned to America again. But I'm getting to that point, where I'm realizing that a) "I live in China," b) "I'll be here for a while" ... and (drumroll) c) "We aren't coming home for Christmas this year." Which all leads to: d) "I need to buck up."

And if you are at all familiar with my hair experiences, you'll know that I like to try new things, but it's a MUST that I know that you know what you're doing. Take my post on Lesson #438 for instance... I just can't handle cheap haircuts by inexperienced people. I've learned that paying the cash for a upscale style is well worth it. And, with that, good ol' Harry (coincidentally, a very humorous American name for a Chinese hair stylist!) was recommended to me by a close friend who's hair is naturally curly with gorgeous highlights, so I thought I'd give him a try.

Gotta Love Shanghai Living

It's been just over eight months now since me and the kids joined Jarin on this magic ride through Asia. I remember him (six months into his journey at the time) all excited about us coming and bursting about how much we were going to love it. And then we arrived. And I was so annoyed and disgusted by the customs and differences. It wasn't Iowa! But, we have adjusted so well and have really begun to appreciate much about this culture.

It became clear as my girlfriends and I were at the farket (fake-market) with our three 2-year-olds. A few women flight attendants stopped us and asked if we lived here. "Yep!" we all smiled. They were intrigued and perplexed enough to continue the conversation and ask why. And so our explosion of Shanghai-awesomeness came. We raved about the jobs, the travel, the schools, the shopping, the friends and the food. It was an easy list to rattle off, and there was no second-guessing as to why we were here.

 
Made me start thinking about all the craziness that we endure here in Shanghai, and the many attributes that make this journey so adventurous. I'm sure the day will come when all this begins to annoy me again too. It'll be at that point that I'll know I've been here too long! In the meantime, here goes a few from my list:

You know you live in China when....

Here's the scoop, sis....

Growing up, I loved when you got into trouble. I would listen in as our parents spoke to you. I wanted to be sure they kept you safe, that they taught you right vs. wrong. It was important that they cared for you as much as I did, if not more.

I hated when you wore my clothes or hung with my friends. I didn't like that you dug in my closet, because it was private, and I didn't care whether or not you asked permission. The fact was that I never wanted to be at fault for leading you astray.

I sometimes heard you cry in your room, but didn't always run to soothe you. You were my baby sis, and I never wanted to see you hurt... I wanted you to grow tough.

I didn't care if the truth hurt you. I would say it as it was. Not to disrespect you, but to help you realize how tough life can be. I never tried to be the bad person, but I wanted you to see a different perspective.

I'm not ready...

In just three days, my baby girl turns two. Two!

And I'm not ready.

I'm not ready to say good bye to the baby years, chunky legs, and naps in the stroller. I absolutely adore the frequent rocks in the chair, humming of lullaby's, cuddles in the afternoon, repeated books, morning snuggles, sloppy eating, unexplained giggles, random tickles, constant snacking, new milestones, and the happy-go-lucky freedom of being a baby. (sigh)

I don't want her to grow up.

Learning Chinese Culture

We've finally wrapped up from a month long celebration of Chinese New Year, which means a lot of red here in Shanghai, and huge cultural lessons happening all the time. From the unit studies at school to field trips, social media and even the local expat parenting magazine are covered with information. I've spent time talking to our driver and Ayi to learn about their traditions as well, and it's fascinating the hear the superstitions that are so vivid still today. The Nian which is a ferocious half bull/half lion creature, and known to be scared away by the color red, noise and fire, creates a booming array of firecrackers every night! Sweeping before New Year pushes away bad luck from the home and later eating dumplings and rice balls bring wealth. There are also strong understandings about the expectation of hangboa and the representation of the New Year animal. 2015 is the Year of the 'yang,' which means sheep, ram or goat, and is truly not well noted as a strong animal. Therefore, it's not the year that families wish to have babies because it resembles much about the child's personality and fate - in this case, the weakest of the 12 zodiac animals. Learning all of this tradition is fascinating, and makes you appreciate the many families that abide so carefully to pattern - something that you often see become minimized in the US.

She's an Animal!

I have a terror on my hands! She has the energy of a wild rabbit, the toughness of a tiger, and the behavior of a monkey, but she cuddles like a puppy. All 22 months of her, make me crazy! Add to it her lack of sleep, and I have myself wired for the coo-coo house. Each morning she is up by 6 a.m. She tip-toes across the marble-floor apartment (which actually sounds like a penguin waddling on a wet surface), jumps into our king bed, and softly massages my cheeks with the palm of her hand, giving sweet kisses on my forehead and lips. You can hardly be upset by this. So, I get up, we eat breakfast together and start the coffee.

Fast forward through lots of play time, books read on repeat, and a battle of food during the lunch hour, and we have nap time! It's really the same routine each day... I tell her it's rest time. She says, "No!" I say "Yes!" She says, "No!" I lie her down, rub her back, rock her in the chair, pretend I'm sleeping too, leave the room. She comes out. I put her back. She comes out. I put her back. She comes out. I put her back and try the tricks again. I threaten to take away playdates. She outsmarts me. We do it again. By the time she's finally asleep, we get about 45 min to 1 hour of rest before bus duty with the older two. Great.

A Glimpse at Repatriation

Remember back to that college spring break trip. You headed out on the road with a few of your besties, looking to have the week of your life, ready to be who you wanted and do what you wished. You were free in a sense. And you lived it up! You explored, you partied, you rested, and you met so many new friends. You stayed up late and talked about everything you knew at that point. Then the week wrapped up and you said good-bye to those you met, you shared a hug, said good-luck, and piled back into your parents borrowed vehicle to return home.