Holiday Craze

AAAHHHH!!!

Anyone else feel that way?

I blame a lot on the 6 1/2 month creation that is brewing in my pelvis, creating a brain freeze in my noggin', a side-cramp every time I roll over, and aches when I try to pick up the crumbs on the kitchen floor. (Is this a sign of aging?)

Or wait, maybe the exhaustion is from the fact that I'm trying to work full-time, support my hard-working hubby who is gone more than he's home, cook dinners that are more substantial than Jack's frozen pizza, keep up on the laundry (including Shout-ing out layers upon layers of rainbow Crayola marker from sleeves), and prep for the holidays. Anymore, holiday prep in itself includes more than just cutting down the Christmas tree.

Holiday prep with a six and almost-five-year-old is tricky! Between staying on budget, making sure everyone is (evenly) spoken for, and supplying gifts from St. Nick... God-forbid I can't forget to move "Odie" -- that's the Elf who showed up last year and has been a pain in my side ever since. Honestly, who invented this creature? When he forgets to travel back to the North Pole at night, I get the 3rd degree that I must have touched him and made him "lose his magic." Really?

I have enough trouble just trying to keep Santa's magic in our home. I understand Cade and Layna are far too young to give up on the idea of Santa being real, but let's be real... I've almost spilled the beans multiple times just this year. I can't just pick up stocking stuffers anymore when we're out and about, tags can't say the Gap, Dick's, or Target because they know those stores as places mom frequents. Shoot, the wrapping paper and handwriting even has to be different than mom's.

Is there a parenting class that I missed along the way on how to do this?

Maybe next year Odie will steal Barbie's convertible or take the Build-A-Bear on in a game of chess... but until then, we're keeping it simple.

Gender Reveal!!!

In a recent post, I shared that we would soon reveal the gender of this acrobatic monkey inside me. Now, at 24 weeks and 14 extra pounds, it's time!

Let me preface with... Finding out the gender didn't seem like a big deal to me. We have one of each. I'm okay not having the nursery completely painted prior to arrival. I've saved all my boy and girl baby-goods. I never knew in advance with Cade or Layna, and survived just fine. And honestly, I didn't really care either way. I truly down played the whole experience.

But, I was making a big deal of it "for the kids". So, (with the help of Pinterest) I planned to have an old friend of ours join us for an afternoon of {awesome} photography. I prepared a cardboard box for hours and sent Jarin to the florist for balloons. 35 balloons to be exact. And for all of you party-throwers out there... FYI, there is a helium shortage. Yep. 35 balloons equals 75 bucks. Trust me, the bean-counting husband of mine was not thrilled.

But he bought them as instructed; we corralled our neighbor to help get them from the black bags to the cardboard box without us seeing. And in the back of the mama-van they went. To find out what happened after that point, you'll have to tune into the video below:

As you can imagine, it was the best experience of my life. I didn't expect emotions to run over me like they did. And the best part of it all was that we could celebrate together. I wasn't tied down to the ultrasound bed, or paralyzed from an epidural. I was free to grab my kids and my husband, and embrace the new baby girl that would soon join us.

And as I turned around to watch all those balloons float into the heavens, I realized that those whom I loved the most, those who couldn't be with us to celebrate these new milestones... they were the ones finding out first.

Time Together

Remember when they told you that love-making, romanticism, and butterflies would end after you got married? Remember when you told them they were crazy?

Recall when they told you life was really over after having kids, that there was no way to relive all the fun, spice, and excitement in bed that you had early on? Remember then wondering if they might be right... even just a little.

After being together for 12 years, married for 8, I've experienced the emotional, sexual, and romantic fears that come with being married, starting careers, bearing children, becoming parents, and wishing you had time alone more frequently. I've also had the opportunity to mature in my way of thinking about love.

It was about a year ago, when a friend introduced me to the book, The 5 Love Languages, by Gary Chapman, that I started to be intriqued by this idea. (She actually co-wrote her experience with her husband in a recent post on the Quad City Moms Blog -- which is super cool!)

Okay, so yes, I understood that love comes in other ways beyond the bedroom, but I hadn't realized that love can be felt and expressed just as strongly through these other languages. The truth is that everyone speaks a love language, and once you decipher what that is, it's really easy to feel less attention-deprived and more loved every day.

So, on my journey through this book, I learned that my #1 love language is clearly Quality Time. I want nothing more than to have time with my loved ones that is focused, where conversation is strong, smiles connect us, and emotions are felt by the experience of just being together. Let me share my examples:

• One of my favorite memories as a child was when my dad would take my sister and I out to the airport to watch planes come in. We were not distracted by TV, video games, or interruptions. Our conversations were focused on the same thing, at the same time. And not one of us had a passion for flight.
• My husband's proposal to me was perfect because we were sitting alone on a dock, staring at the stars, and reminiscing about the days when we started dating. We aren't astrologists by any means, and we don't understand constellations. But it was just us, hearing each other out.
• A recent family day trip gave us exactly what I was craving. We piled the kids into the minivan and headed for NE Iowa, where the leaves are a perfect crisp orange and burnt red in early October. The hills roll for miles and it's awesome to watch the reflection of them on the river. And as we entered this area of the state, we ooh'd and aah'd together, snapped photos, toured Spook Cave, and ate at the unforgettable Pete's Hamburgers in Prairie du Chien.
• The holidays are a some of my favorite times each year because we all have a break from school, work, routine, and chaos. We have time for home cooking, movies and popcorn, game nights, and snuggling.

Now, don't let me fool you, Physical Touch is still my love-language-runner-up, but you may not have suspected that Receiving Gifts scores zero points in my book!

Find out how you feel love by taking the online quiz! 

Truth from Teachers

One of the most nerve-wracking, feel-good moments of being a parent is attending your child’s school conference. At the early age of 3, you sign up to have someone else inform you how your child fares among their peers. It’s one of those times that I truly expect to hear “good” things, but at the same time, am very open to constructive feedback, areas of improvement, and even challenges that come with all kids learning at various intervals. My appreciation goes out to all educators who make this happen on a daily basis.

This week, we had the chance to talk with both of the kids’ teachers. Here’s a recap:

Caden

He’s caught up on his reading level, performing right at the targeted expectation for the end of the first trimester. This was a huge area of improvement for him so far in 1st grade. I remember back to preschool, and I was regularly checking in with an early childhood professional from the AEA, concerned that he wasn’t really talking yet. In kindergarten, we tried getting him to read by the end of the year, but he would get so mad and frustrated that it wasn’t productive for any of us. And he was behind in his reading level, as of the end of last year. Today, he’s reading his own books, sounding out words when he’s unsure, using phonemic illustrations for words that are not spelled as they sound (he tells us this is just like sign language on paper), and he’s interested in reading. At the same time, he’s excelling in math. Cade claims this to be his favorite part of school, and he’s already surpassed the mathematical goals for the entire year. His teacher (who is amazing!!, by the way) has promised him that she’ll continue to support him as far as he can make it this year. To my complete surprise, we learned that he is one of 6 kids in the entire 1st grade (roughly 65 kids) that is being pulled out on Fridays for expanded arithmetic lessons. Wow. As a parent, what do you say to that?

Alayna

She loves school, and is such a helper among her peers. When the teachers need to call on someone to lead by example, buddy up with a younger child, or wait turns appropriately, she is the go-to gal. Her strengths lie in her creative abilities: coloring, cutting, drawing, singing, and reading. She’s definitely up to speed on knowing her ABC’s, understanding the combinations of letters which make words, and how to write her name with upper and lower case letters appropriately and legibly. Her counting has been above average; while many know how to count, she is counting objects and identifying the correct numbers associated with the count. She continues to work on her A-B-C patterns, but is coming along very well. Layne refrains from tantrums and sassy language at school and toward her teachers (thankfully!), but does give them The Glare when she doesn’t appreciate the direction she was given. I'm told over-and-over that this is a sign of her independence... a great attribute for a woman. We continue to focus on her enunciation of letters R and L, although, I have to say that her little southern-drawl is too cute.

 

 

I sure hope that both of the babes continue succeeding academically. It’s such a blessing to have children who naturally love school, and are challenged to always do their best while there. Academics are such an integral part of growing, and we couldn’t be more proud of their 6- and 4- year old accomplishments.

Half-Way There!

I woke today with excitement and anticipation! It was time for our 20 week ultrasound! First thing's first... I peed in my cup, showered, and got the kids ready for school. At breakfast, Alayna looks at me funny as says, "Mom, I think it's weird that you have to show your doctor your pee again!"

Yeah, well that statement turned into an entire breakfast conversation between a 4- and 6- year old of: "how does she get her pee in there?" ... "oh, I bet she scooped it out of the toilet!" ... "how does it stay in there!" ... "I wonder where do she puts it"? ... "why is it so yellow?"

Okay, enough! I fessed up to the kids as though they were crazy for not understanding how this works... I explained that I simply put the cup under my butt and pee in it! Then the doctor tests it to see if the baby is okay. Fine, they got it.

After just a couple hours in meetings, I raced out, picked up the hubs from the office, and arrived at the appointment just in time. Whoo-hoo, it was time to see this baby in action!

Oh yeah, time to weigh in. Another 3 lbs gained since the 16 week appt. Jarin clarified quickly that was 9 lbs since pre-pregnancy... thanks A-Hole. Did I mention that we should mandate husband weigh-ins each month too?

Right away, I handed the technician our orange envelope with card inside that read:

It's A _________

I clarified that we do not want to know the gender today, and she agreed. Carefully I listened as she described the baby's anatomy, but she never slipped with a he or she. Come to find out, it is a perfectly healthy 11 oz. baby - spine, brain, stomach, arms and legs were all perfect, and the strong heartbeat came in at 136 bpm. I could even count all 10 toes and fingers.

Okay, so quite possibly Baby is flipping us off in this one picture, but after about a half hour of poking and prodding, this little Baby was fed up and tired! Watch this sweet moment that was captured with Baby's big yawn:

 

We left the office, and Jarin designated himself keeper of the envelope which holds the card with the now-filled-in-blank. How he got to be the lucky one, I'm not sure. Although, if I had access, I may be tempted to peek!

 

So, what do you think it is? Take the poll on the right side of the blog, and stay tuned for the big reveal, compliments of Bella Daisy Photography.

NFL Inspired

I've shared enough headaches about the girl recently, it's finally time for the boy to shine.

***deep sigh***

Oh, where to start? He's my football-maniac, mesmerized by everything sports-related.

For flag football, he needed gloves

His favorite team is ... ANYone who plays NFL
He can spit out the name, position, and jersey number of any player that is remotely good
He knows plays, penalties, and the purpose
He'll let you know if they "shoulda had that"
He was honestly frustrated that Jarin and I were not taking him to a Bears game
He plays with the 5th graders at recess, and scores on them

Attending only two Iowa games already this season was "just not fair"
He'd rather watch ESPN than a cartoon/movie any day
He's frustrated if you walk in front of him while he's watching a game on TV
He DVR's any games he can't stay up late enough to watch
He's infatuated!

So, here's the down side... he's also very consumed by the attire, brand names, and look of football players. He thinks he needs new shoes everytime a style is highlighted on ESPN; he wants new gloves because of the brand; he needs a new helmet that has a face mask designed like the pros; and he wants to wear shorts with tall Nike Elite socks.

Seriously, he's 6!!! We've made the deal with him that he can wear shorts if the high will be at least 60 degrees. (We all know that day isn't coming in Iowa until April!) But, today, he begged to wear shorts. Dad made him a deal that if he promised not to take off his pants, he could wear shorts underneath. Little did Cade know that daddy teaches JA at his school, and out of coincidence, Jarin ran into Cade in the hallway today.

He was wearing shorts.

I soon receive the heated phone call at work, and Jarin and I are quickly creating the "game plan" for the evening. We determined that I would continue on with my night and act as though I am not aware of "the incident"; I'd see what he's wearing at pick up, ask him about his day, and see if he mentions running into daddy today. Ultimately, we're going to find out how honest this kid really is. Oh, game is on! And mom and dad are teaming up to outsmart the boy.

Yeah, well, he played Joe Cool with me tonight and ignored the fact that he just tried to pull a fast one over on us. Then Daddy came home, and he was BUSTED!!!!

So, what witty stories are we going to be dealing with in another 10 years?

Thoughts from a Working Mom

I read Allison Tate's blog the other day: The Mom Stays in the Picture and I spent the next couple days collecting my thoughts about the message and how I compete. While I appreciate and agree with her message to have mom say cheese with the kiddos, what this blog did for me was even more than that... it begged the question: am I spending enough time with my children?

The answer is clearly no. There are not enough hours in one day to work full-time, be a wife, daughter, sister, friend, and aunt, and still find the amount of time in one day to be with my kids as much as I wish I could. I've found in just 6 years that children grow way too fast. While I sweat those moments that Allison speaks of (preparing for birthdays, Halloween, and Christmas), it is usually because I'm trying to force 2 weeks of planning into 2 days. I never have the time I want to live, save, and cherish the moments as I wish I could.

And it's because I am a working mom.

If I could share my thoughts with my kids, I would tell them this: I wish I could be home with you every day, to take you to school, read to your class, join the field trip, allow you to be a "car rider", eliminate the need for someone else to feed you an after-school snack, help you with homework, or let you run in our backyard. I wish I could enroll you in gymnastics or read "book cart" with you after school, so that you didn't have to stay up so late at night to fit in all the activities. I wish you knew that I cry when you do every morning that I have to leave you at daycare, so that I can be at work on time. Know that it's your pictures on my desk that get me through the day, and it makes my day 100 times better when someone asks me about you.

I would also tell them that I love my job. I want to make an impact in children's lives who aren't as fortunate, blessed or loved as you are at home. I wish there was a better way to show you what I do each day when I leave you at daycare. If only you saw what I work for every day, you would know that it's all worth it. I know your heart would be as big as mine is. I believe you would understand that there is room in my day for both -- you and my professional passion.

And some day, if it's possible, I promise to give more time to you when you need it most. When going to school isn't always fun and light-hearted, when days are long, recess isn't an option, and gym isn't what you look forward to. When kids make fun of each other, making friends feels like a war, and when peer pressure gets the best of some... I promise to be more present during those days. If and when that day comes, we'll owe it to daddy for all that he does to make that possible.

Until then, we'll keep taking pictures to remember all the fun that we have together now. I love you.

TMI of Pregnancy

I've always said that pregnancy is beautiful; that God has created a magical experience with motherhood; and that it's one of the most unexplainable treasures that a woman can ever live through. However, I have determined one (of many) non-gorgeous moments of carrying a child: Vericose Veins.

The back of my legs look like a frickin maze blocked by blue blood vessel borders, which have continual deadends. They feel like they may explode at any point, and the only relief comes from medically perscribed compresion hose. And, isn't that a thoughtful invention! Every morning, I sit on the floor of my closet, in my bra and unds, trying to bend over to touch my toes just to pull on these wicked pieces of therapy. Let's be honest, they take the strength of a moutain lion to get them over your heel, and once you get that completed, you're out of breath and lucky to have them stretched up and over your thighs before one of the other two kids (or husband) breaks into the closet to laugh and stare at you as if you just landed from outerspace.

And because they are over $100 a pop, you can only afford one pair. But with just a couple days of continuous wear, they are stretched out. Not, of course, in the areas that you need them to be (like in the heel) but at the thigh. Great, so Sunday (as I am walking/jogging a 5K) I feel them begin to slide down. Finally, I mention to the hubs that they are now down past my knees and not at all assisting in the pain that is throbbing on the back of my legs. His response: "do you want to stop to pull them up?" Oh, yeah, let me start my morning-closet-routine in front of thousands of people. It's not as simple as just pulling up an athletic sock.

By the way, did I mention that I'm only 16 weeks? My last pregnancy, I started wearing this fashion accessory at 28 weeks, and by the time I delivered at 37, I had vuvla veins. Honestly, did you know those existed? I didn't either. So, if that progression happened in 9 weeks last time, I wonder where I'll find painful, popping, protruding veins in the next 24 weeks.

Sixty Years

A life is not lived, if not lived to the fullest. For Clyder, I have to believe that he fulfills his life with enjoyment. He treasures his family, has a passion for his career, adores his hobbies, and shares his interests with others. Whether it's cheering for the Vikings, Twins, or Hawkeyes, bird-watching, beer-drinking, card-playing, Western-watching, or coin-collecting, my father-in law is always teaching my kids to love what he does. He's a man that doesn't show much anger, keeps even-keeled, and has the biggest heart. He will always tell you hello and ask how you are when he sees you, and doesn't ever forget to call on your important days.

Today, Clyde celebrates 60 years. These years aren't something that he has many regrets for. He is a man that is rooted in his heritage, proud of his upbringing, and willing to look for the best in each day ahead. He's a man that many would be lucky to duplicate. Happy Birthday Clyder... and cheers!

The Latest (and Greatest!)

I remember a few months back, talking to my sister about this blog, and she said to me, "I would never have anything to say in a blog!" Some days I wonder if her view on that has changed now since having Hayden and watching her changes, milestones, and new accomplishments. In the moment, you promise to never forget how old they were when they said "mama", or where you were when they learned to use the potty, or when they got their first tooth (or lost it!). You always believe that your family trip will stay fresh in your mind and that their first soccer game will be a memory forever. But, let's be real.

 

With both of us working full time, trying to keep up with house chores, cleaning up after two kids, and hauling them to every activity under the sun... I can't remember any of it! So, that's why I started this blog years ago, and while I'm not always the best with posting regularly, I do try to capture a few of my favorites. Everything from the funniest things that come out of the kids' mouths to my baby sister's big day is recorded here.

 

So, you wonder what the latest is?

 

 

We're on to #3, and couldn't be happier! We found out just before week 4, and quite possibly I started showing that same day. Seriously? Who does that happen to? I thought maternity clothes came out of the closet in the 4th month, not the 4th week!?!?!

 

We also decided not to inform the kids right away. There is such a risk of them telling everyone in the grocery store that "mom is having a baby!!!" that we decided to wait until we were really ready to spread the news. However, my mom came over one day during week 4 and asked, in front of the kids, "how's the baby?" Immediately, I had four eyeballs staring me down and asking, "what baby?," "where's the baby?"

By week 5, I was in bed by 8:30 and ready to scream it from the roof tops! How could I honestly hide it any longer? Beyond a little fatique and this "bump" (which my mother informed me my belly button was already popped out) I haven't felt anything - no nausea, headaches, cramps - nothing.

So, week 6 is a different ballgame. I could stay in bed all day. I wake up with the requirement of water and saltine crackers. I am obviously pregnant to the outside world now, and the kids have blatantly asked if I have a baby in my tummy. Yep, they even honestly expressed that "it's bigger" and that is how they knew. Ah, the frankness of a 4 year old. Jarin and I decided to tell them this week. We read the book Baby Bear and the Bundle of Joy, and they were pretty excited to be getting their own bundle soon. The reality is that Cade just wants his room downstairs so that he can watch the 70" TV whenever he wants!

Fast forward to week 7 and I've now announced it at work! Done hiding it. One, I'm so excited, and two, I can't button my pants. I pulled out the belly-band now and have run out of baggy dress clothes in my closet. I go to the doctor next week, but it isn't until 12 weeks that you even get to hear the heartbeat. I might have to figure out a way to get an early ultrasound. Shoot, enough people have asked if I'm having twins.... you'd think that'd work.

During week 9, I started reading the books that the doctor sent me home with last week. And by the first night, I slammed them shut. They told me that twins were most common in women in their early 30's AND I shouldn't be showing until 20 weeks. Yeah, well, see for yourself what 9 weeks of pregnancy looks like on me:

 

Week 10 and 11 went by pretty fast, although it's amazing the amount of pressure I'm already feeling. The vericose veins are starting to pop out of my legs, and I see TED hose in my near future. Already wearing the maternity pants... finagaling the rubber band around my pant buttons for the last 5 weeks is getting old.

 

We headed out the doc during week 12, and it was confirmed that everything being bigger, worse, more painful, and more exhausting was just a sign of having a third baby. Holy crap. How do those crazy moms of 8 kids do it? Heartbeat was strong and solid at 158 beats per minute. They couldn't guarantee that there was only one bambino cooking though, so we headed for an ultrasound on Friday. And here is the beautiful profile....

 

 

Jarin scoped the screen trying to identify the gender, but it couldn't be determined by our expertise :) Heartbeat was 146 though, so our guess is boy. Either way, there is only one, and the baby was bigger than anticipated -- due date is now moved up to March 26th.

 

15 weeks down, and 25 more to go! ... if I make it that long.

She Taught Me

It was another day in the life of being a mom, sister, daughter, aunt, wife, employee, and friend.

After a full day at work, Alayna and I went rounds again after school. This time it was because she nonchalantly walked into Caden's daycare tonight and erased the whiteboard-artwork of him and his girl-friend. I didn't know whether to be proud that she was showing his "girlfriend" that Lil' Sis was in town, or frustrated that she was just that rude and blunt. Either way, she didn't apologize, and I fought the battle until she did.

Jarin then came home, asked if we wanted to go on a walk -- let's be real, it is beautiful out -- but I couldn't reward the little snot. She was charged with helping with laundry, making dinner, and setting the table. Dinner was served just as the boys came home from their jog.

Moogs and Miss Hayden stopped by then. Can't get enough love from that little stinker. Some day, I promised Meg that she'd give her a run for her money, just as Alayna does me. We'll see. Mom took a detour on her way home from the grocery store, and came to say hi before bedtime. This is the joy of being so close to family. We giggled together for a bit, and then Grandma reitterated with Alayna the importance of letting others know when you are in the wrong.

I chose a random bedtime story from Alayna's library as I tucked her in, (recall the occurrence from just 3 hours prior) and it ended with this:

"I love you when you're nice. I love you cranky, too.

I love you without liking the naughty things you do."

 

We sat together after this, my four-year-old and I, talking about the meaning. I explained that no matter what she ever did, I'd love her because I was her mommy; but that didn't make her actions right. She was actually listening, believe it or not, and even responded with, "I'm sorry." Those were the two words I worked on for nearly an hour tonight, and here in just 3 minutes, she got it.

 

And then I thought about the many things I may have done to disappoint my mom, sister, or husband. The negative things I may have said to them, or even my kids. Have I always stood up to say sorry? Or did I assume they knew? Sometimes it's the lack of communication that we provide to those we care most about, that leaves the biggest scar.

 

As my cell rang, I tucked Alayna in, and on the front of my phone I saw a photo of a far away friend, who I hadn't seen in nearly 2 years. God was making an amazing connection for me at this moment. Did she know how often I think of her; how much it meant that she called? This was my chance to do as I say, and I was sure to share how excited I was to hear from her.

 

I found it so thoughtful that she took the time to call, and felt so bad that I haven't been the one with initiative. For her, and many of my friends who live across the country, my lack of communication means that I owe you an apology. I do care, and think of you often.

 

Thank you Alayna for teaching me a message tonight. Just as I shared with you the meaning and ease in saying I'm sorry... so too is finding 30 minutes for a friend.

Intervention

And, the worst-mom-of-the-day goes to... Kristi!

Yep, that is about how I felt today. Tired and hungry, I picked up the kids from school. Late, of course. I told them I'd be there before 5 p.m. It was now 5:10. That's pretty much how my day went though. As I walked into the building I debated who to pick up from their room first. I landed on Alayna... not sure why, but it was a mistake. She wasn't done coloring. I said 'Hi' as I walked in, asked her to pick up her items, and then started visiting with the teachers. I realized then that she was not paying a darn ounce of attention to me, so just as I was taught on SuperNanny, I knelt down to her level and calmy asked her to put away the markers.

She still thought my request meant nothing, and continued ignoring me. Okay, I thought, we'll do the count-to-3-trick. Still nothing. Finally, I took the markers out of her hand, replaced the caps and picked up her paper. In return I received a few hits to the face, kicks to the body, tearing of the paper and screaming at the top of the lungs.

Seriously? At this point, it wasn't only the other 3- and 4-year olds who were staring, it was the teachers, the parents, and the daycare director. Yep. I was doing awesome.

I picked up the little brat and carried her to her locker (heaven for bid it be outside the classroom!) I didn't look up, but I'm sure they were still staring. Alayna was now ripping her bag out of my hands, hitting her locker and bawling. You'd seriously have thought I was trying to kidnap her.

Somehow I saved her eyeglasses from being torn off her face and grabbed my keys, her ruffled papers, folder and opened backpack in one arm, had the 42-pounder under the other, pushed the classroom door opened and escaped into the hallway. Whew! There was a chair, and she was going to time out.

Nice try Super-Mom. All she had to do was get up. And just as any SuperNanny would teach, I picked her up, placed her right back in the chair and turned my back to eliminate any attention. Okay, so repeat 2-3-5 times, and what do you get? You guessed it! The daycare director intervention!

Sure enough Gina came out, sat down by Alayna and said, "You're mommy is going to go get your brother now. You can stay with me and talk about why you are mad. She'll come back for you." And with that, my control was gone. I was walking away, letting someone (much wiser and calmer than I) take care of her.

After getting Cade (who, may I add, is so easy!?!?!) we returned to the hall where Alayna's chaos had come to a halt. She had the attention of two teachers now, and as we approached her they enforced the need to tell mommy sorry. Pouts and all, we left the building and made it to the car. It was all I could do to not rip out the spankings from my pile of never-tried-mommy-techniques. But I didn't.

When we got home, it was a time out and then a removal of all bedtime snuggles -- no more stuffed animals, pillow pets, or build-a-bears for one week. I'll show her yet.

Tying the Knot

It's been about a month now since we celebrated Mike's final day as a single man. For those of you who don't know Mikey, he's Jarin's younger (by a year) cousin. They pretty much grew up like brothers ... well, as close as they could be while living 600 miles apart. I got the privilege of really getting to know him when we all lived in Minneapolis together, and there probably isn't a better man in this world. He's passionate, sensitive, genuine, and humorous. And he's a family man. Thankfully, he also chose to marry the world's best woman... with a heart of gold and spirit like you've never witnessed. Melissa and him make an amazing couple, and we waited years for the day when he finally got down on one knee.

Soon after proposal, they asked Cade to be their ring bear. (And he took his job seriously, panicking during the ceremony when he realized they were exchanging rings... but he was still holding the (fake) ones!) The wedding took place at the family lake home on Pickeral Lake, in South Dakota. This place isn't just an ordinary lake home -- it holds history and family memories that tell stories. Grandpa and Grandma Brandly purchased it 40 years ago, and it's standard that the children in the family grow up boating, skiing, and playing cards there. Nine years ago, Jarin proposed to me on the same dock where Mike and Melissa exchanged vows. If Grandma were here to experience all that I have there in just 10 years, she would be amazed.

The location was only a small part of the beauty that made the Kolb wedding what it was. They even recorded instructions for their own flash mob, and let me tell you how cool it was to watch that in action at the reception! Dynamite is now the kids' new favorite song, well, because they have a coordinating dance routine!

I regret that it's taken me so long to share our memories from their day. It was so spectacular in every way, that I wanted to capture our whole experience. Watch the video for yourself, and even through some poor video quality, you'll see just how unique of a day it was.... every detail was perfect.

If you can't see this video, click here.



He got me!

I knew something was going on. We'd just celebrated 8 years together as a married couple, and I was told not to make any plans for the weekend. What I didn't know was how swept off my feet I was about to be. Friday, I began to pack my bag, and it went kinda like this....
K: "So, will I need jeans?"
J: "Maybe."
K: "Should I bring a swimsuit?"
J: "If you want to."

As you can imagine, I started to get a little tested. Not to be rude and all, but it's okay to surprise me... not okay to annoy me. After a LONG process of choosing outfits, then changing my mind, I finally settled on a couple get-ups, and off we went. First stop: dropping off the kids. Again, I was clueless. Didn't know who's house they were going to, what they were going to do, whether or not sunscreen was packed or not, or even how long until I could see them again. {Later I'd uncover that we were dropping them off at Nana and Grandpa's for one night and they'd be enjoying a fun evening at the ball park  Absolutely no reason to worry.}

We continued our drive south through town, and Jarin asked what was on my mind. I was totally thrown for a loop. Downtown Cedar Rapids? Nope, we're now out of town. Des Moines? Nope he headed west just to throw me off before exiting off the interstate. Iowa City? Nope, passed that. Quad Cities it must be! Sure enough, we exited near our old house, filled up on gas, and ... back on the road! You have to be kidding me, I thought. It was now two hours since leaving our house, and I still had no flippin' clue where my fabulous-jack-ass-of-a-husband was taking me.

At this point, I was getting irked. In case you didn't know, I love to plan. When that control is taken away from me.... ugh! I was confused. Jarin smirked. I was pissed. Jarin laughed.

And yet part of me was loving every moment of the excitement!

Finally, he gives me the go ahead to open the glove compartment. Inside I find the most perfect card with the following message:

"To my beautiful bride of 8 years.... These have been the best 8 years I could ask for. Here is to a great weekend and many more happy years. Love you. Jarin"

And then inside are two tickets to the Brad Paisley, Miranda Lambert, the Band Perry, Jerrod Nieman, and Chris Young concert at Wrigley Field!!! Holy ba-donk-a-donk! This was going to be awesome! But instead, I looked at Jarin and said, "Aw, you could have told me to bring my cowboy boots."
At the next exit, Jarin pulls into the outlet mall, pops the trunk, pulls out by cowboy boots and says, "now you have to find an outfit to match." I was totally overwhelmed! The pressure of shopping in a short amount of time was killing me. But, I did good, shopped quick, spent his money, and we were back on the road.

The night was amazing! We took our time with dinner and drinks before we entered.

We were among an enormous crowd of people... (and, believe me, the nose bleeds didn't bother me one bit!!)

We danced, we sang, we kissed, we drank! And by the end of the night, we even ran into a couple of our favorite people from college. (Don't mind our "googly" eyes -- it's still a cute pic!!)

It was by far one of the best nights that we've spent together in a long time. No interruptions, the time was ours, and the experience was a blast. We stayed in a beautiful hotel downtown Chicago and spent the next morning walking Navy Pier and talking as if it were our first date.

Amazing, scary, cliche, or crazy as it sounds, I learned a lot about my husband of 8 years in just a 36 hour span. And I think the same could be said for him. For any married couple out there... take time together, just the two of you.... go somewhere you can talk, trust, open up, ask questions and hear each other out. You will do wonders for your marriage and for each other.

Time to SLOW down!

If the last month is any preview of how fast the next 10 years are going to go, I'm screwed.

Okay, scratch that... let me start in a more optimistic frame...

Memories are made of moments that keep us living. Moments that drive our days and give us something to wake up to. But they also make us realize just how fast each year seems to go. Here's a recap of the special moments of our life during the the last few weeks...

My first baby turned six years old!

To celebrate he got donuts for breakfast, a visit from mom and McDonalds at school for lunch, and his favorite Happy Joe's personal pizza for dinner. Aunt Meggie even made him the famous Cheap Cake (recipe of his great-grandma Max).

Then we got dare-devilish and took him and four boys to the Kernel's game for a little Schucks action! Cade threw out the first pitch, all the kids were on the jumbotron, cake was delivered, it was hot enough to have cups of ice delivered all day, we went into extra innings and finally we beat those Quad City River Bandits! Now, that is a good baseball game!

Big milestones were also hit at school. Cade completed kindergarten and his teacher, Mrs. Hoefer, was a true inspiration to him. I was amazed to see how he developed his academics in such a short period. Going from the inability to color inside the lines just 10 months ago to writing sentences and reading books independently now. Of course, his favorite subject was gym!

And then there is Layna finishing her first year of preschool. She loves to be artsy, creative, and sing! Her teachers taught her so much about manners and taking turns. It's obvious that she is ready for a full five-day week of preschool next year.

Finally, Jarin and I celebrated 8 years of marriage. Seriously?! I think back to 12 years ago, when I met him... And how he has made me the happiest woman. And with that I realize how fast this is all taking place and the importance of tracking each one of these little instances. For some day, I will blink and this blessed life that I have will be treasures in my heart.

Making a Life

I had heard how awful it was going to be... that I was "signing up" to be the lonely wife for a quarter of every year for the rest of my life. I tried to be tough and resilient. I failed. I'm talking about busy season and it was my future-husband's career choice.

My first experience was 9 years ago. For the most part, everyone was right. I spent a lot of time that year by myself, feeling bad for me, lonely, bored, and tired of not seeing my husband. I was newly married and didn't live up the romanticism that was supposed to come after a honeymoon. Instead, I would often go to bed by myself and rustle in the covers until he got home ... which typically didn't happend until well after 1 or 2 in the morning.

Then we started a family, and I had my hands full with a young infant, and then two. But he was still working frequently, and often into the nights and weekends. I became a single mom. Well, that was my own perception. I was choosing careers for myself that didn't provide a challenge, but offered flexibility for the kids. I was walking around in pity for myself.

After about three years of this, someone shared the following statement with me:

"never get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life"

I took that and ran with it. Literally, I had such faith in this quote that I had it made into a decal for the wall at the bottom of my staircase. Here, my husband could see it every morning as he walked out of the house. It was a reminder for him, and I, that there were other things more important than one's work.

Somewhere between 2007 and now, I've shifted my thoughts. It's not about me. And frankly, it's not about the kids. They are adaptable to change. This pattern of work hours is normal to them. And, let's face it, they remain safe and loved by me (or whoever it is that may need to pick them up from school in a pinch).

It's really about my husband. It's about the effort that he puts forth to be great at his job. It's the example that he is setting about what it means to be a professional and work for what you want. It's about his love for his career and passion for what he does. It's about the sacrifices that are made to support those you love. It's about his lack of time with the kids (and me) because of all this, and his disappointment when he can't get home in time to tuck them in or kiss me goodnight.

And while I still believe in the value of making a life for yourself, sometimes a life includes a career, a passion, and balance. Balance that my husband has found for him and us. After nearly 10 years of experience in this whirlwind of travel, long hours and juggling of schedules, we've accomplished yet another busy season. And they get easier each year. I contribute that to finally understanding how important this is to him and our family, how proud I am to see him succeed, and how appreciative we are for all that he gives up for us.

Think about what making a life means to you; accept that everyone's definitions are different; and decide whether you accomplishing that.

Welcome Hayden Ranae!

They say that only an aunt can give hugs like a mother, can keep secrets like a sister, and share love like a friend. After welcoming Hayden Ranae to the world on Wednesday, it made sense. She is everything perfect. I have spent the last two days admiring her during each free moment I've had. I've watched her face expressions and listened to her whimpers. I saw her attempt to nurse her first time, laid awake late at night thinking about her and reminiscing about her smell, fingers, hair, and smile.

I can't wait to embrace her in my arms with love, watch her grow into a young lady, witness her attitude and watch her parents get frustrated, be there when she needs a non-judgemental ear, support her in her life decisions, encourage her to pursue dreams and let her know how much I love her.

Hayden, you've already changed my life, and you don't even know it yet. In just 24 hours, and I already know that you'll be amazing! I can't wait for this world to meet you and see all that you have to offer.

Hayden Ranae Hodgins

April 11, 2012 7:30 p.m.

6 lbs 4 oz ~ 19 in

Pinterest Innovation

I'm really not the creative type. Any personal ingenious comes from someone else’s inspiration. But, hey, I was taught to not reinvent the wheel, so I do my best. I rattled my brain for a short while before realizing that the key to baby-shower-success is Pinterest. They have everything from décor to food. After logging in, it was a piece of cake (without the cake!)

I started with the nursery theme "You are My Sunshine"...

Added a cute handmade invitation that sold for $15 each on Etsy,,,

Messed up, uh, I mean, tore, ripped, shredded, uh created a few beautiful tissue poofs,,,

Combined those with the thoughtful "Wishes for Baby" hand-written by a five year old and distributed to all 50+ attendees at the shower...

Added a diaper trike for the Harley-loving parents, which sells for $65 online...

Borrowed my daughters bed canopy for a soft flair and reused the bazillion cake stands left over from the wedding...

And wah-lah!! We have a beautiful brunch, in a rented space, that served our baby shower needs for one of the most special ladies in my life... my sis.

Take 1, 2.... 6, 7...

It was such a fun night at the Hansen's -- and, of course, we celebrated with ice cream!!

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

One of my goals as a mom is to teach my children respect. Respect in the biggest form possible -- manners, thoughtfulness, sharing, empathy, listening, appreciation, turn-taking -- and giving. Coincidentally, Lent seems to be the perfect season to encourage the opportunity to give.

So, last week, we attended Ash Wednesday mass (as we do every year), but this year on the way home, we explained that the ashes were a sign of our repentance to God... or in our words to the kids, "a promise to God that we wouldn't do bad things". I didn't anticipate that the kids would fully understand what Lent was all about, but the more we talked about it, the more they listened and were intrigued.

That night we made our commitments. Jarin gave up snacking between meals, I decided to withdraw from caffeine, and the kids agreed to say no to candy for the next 40 days. "Oh, this will last a whole 2 days," I thought to myself! Well, 8 days later and we're doing pretty good (other than Jarin is hungry, I'm tired, and we're both crabby!) The kids though, have been pretty faithful -- but quick to explain that fruit snacks and cookies are not considered candy!

Caden has also added a new sacrifice to his list. He's given up "loving up on girls!" Seriously. At first, wondered if I heard him right, but I did. He's sticking to it too, and barely can give hugs and kisses to mom or grandma until Easter! Still working on explaining that one, but overall, a good start to the "giving" theme. Giving up things we don't need in our lives has been pretty easy. Now, we are on to tackling the conversations about giving more to others....

Today was the perfect, unfortunate segway. We received a letter at home yesterday that Sailor's dad was killed in a snowmobile accident over the weekend. You probably don't know Sailor. I don't either. But she is in Caden's kindergarten class. Five years old with a brother in 4th grade, and now without a father. I had the note from school sitting on the counter this morning when Caden brought it over to me and dropped his head without saying a word. I asked him if he knew what that sheet of information was about and he said yes.

As he stood there silent, I promised him that today after school we would get some cash to contribute to the fund for Sailor and her family. He somberly mumbled, "okay" and continued putting on his coat. As I left the house, I thought about that situation and all the support that I would need if I were in that mother's shoes. I truly can't imagine.

When I came home tonight, I learned that not only did my husband stop on the way to school for cash, but Caden reached into his own piggy bank before leaving and chose to donate $5.00 of his own money too. At that moment, it was obvious that we've been doing the right thing as parents. I was so proud of Cade and the respect that he showed, not only to the poor Schultz family, but to me.

Celebrating As A Girl Should

Jan 2012 arrived and Miss Sassy Pants decided that it was going to be a Birthday WEEK! Right on sweetie, as it should be! And so this is how we celebrated...

Monday Layne spent the day shopping at Coral Ridge with mom and Grandma. We did a little Victoria's Secret and a little Build-A-Bear. Made everyone happy, really. Okay, so she doesn't look super thrilled here, but that is just because she was mad at me for capturing the excess of lipstick that she had on, in addition to mom's face powder!

Tuesday after coming home from school, Alayna found that a birthday present was delivered early. A new bed and dresser set AND Hello Kitty sheets! What could be better!? She was a happy camper to finally transition from the crib to a twin bed. (Okay, so I know she is 4 now, and was still in a crib size bed... whatever.)

And I thought she'd look so big in this bed... oh no! Not when she brings her whole toy box to bed with her!

Wednesday was a tougher day for celebration, because we spent about 2 hours at an optometrist getting her eyes checked, dialated, and examined. Sure enough, she has astigmatism at 2 diopters, which is a moderate level, but requires corrective lenses.

Thankfully, she got to spend the rest of the day with her Nana and Hello Kitty sunglasses. I hear she was pretty bossy and deliberately gave directions as she saw fit for the day! Thanks Nana for putting up with the princess! :)

Thursday was finally the big 4th birthday! We had walking tacos and ice cream sundaes at the house and she enjoyed lots of fun time with her family she loves the most!

Friday was a very special day. After getting picked up early from school, Aly and mommy ordered the Hello Kitty cupcakes that have been talked about all too highly for the past month. Next stop was the Optical Shop to pick out her first pair of specs!

Biases aside, can she really get any cuter?

Saturday was low key, but we had fun finishing off her bedroom, putting all the fun new clothes away, cleaning out the toy room, storing old baby toys, and making room for the new. Oh, and of course she had to go shopping with Grandma for a new coat and baby (as though Christmas and birthday hadn't brought enough! And did I mention that we were just cleaning out the toy room? Oh, pardon me, it's her birthday week!) Plus, she insisted that we bake cookies and paint our nails... with sparkles of course!

Sunday brought the actual birthday party for friends at the Play Station. 10 little ones joined Aly for a big celebration of her first four years! Cupcakes, tunnels, presents and slides -- everyone had loads of fun.

Although, she wouldn't thank anyone for the gifts or for coming, she really did appreciate all her friends being there. We're still working on the snotty, entitled, sassy attitude that hits at the most inopportune times. But, as you can see she did have an awesome time and crashed hard once we got in the car.

In all, she knows how to raise our blood pressure, but she also does pretty well at melting our hearts. We couldn't be more happier to have this little princess in our lives. Thank you Alayna for all that you are to us, the patience that you create and expire, and the love that you bring to our family!